I’m paying attention

I see it

The blood

The bodies

The children

Families

Homes

Lives

All destroyed

I hear you

I you wanting me to call out

To ring out

To say that you are right and they are wrong

That they are evil and your grief and vengeance is justified

I want your approval

I want to be seeing as doing the ‘right thing’

Being a ‘good person’

And I’m paralyzed

Because I see both sides

I see the death

The destruction

The fear

The hopelessness

The grief

I see it and know that neither side is immune from it

No one is above it

I’m paying attention

And I’m filled with grief and sadness

The endless loop of death and hatred

Today it is Israel/Palestine

Today it is our American Society

Ukraine, Yemen, Hurricanes, Famine, School Shootings, Car Jackings….

And the numbness sets in

I’m paying attention

I hear your cries

I see both sides

I wanted to say something profound

And all I have are these words….

Which feel wholly inadequate

And wholly authentic

I’m paying attention…

(I also feel incredibly scared to share this and relieved that I have.)